About Me
Facts About Me
Roman Catholic Confirmation Name: Joanna (named in accordance with a tiny section of the Catechism of the Roman Catholic Church of thinking up names)
Things in My Room: noisemaker (soon a loud fan) & foam I have to get online now, jugs of water, sofa, nice fuzzy hot pink pillow chair back and arm support, extension chord outside of my room for a better socket for computer because it turned off a lot during rain, electric guitar and was learning notes from my dad's old book, keyboard, small harp
Personal Care: Sheer Blonde lightest shades, waterproof earplugs I have to get online now, used to use bathroom wipes all the time, adult diapers in a large pack from Costco, vitamins (including heart pills and flaxseed oil)
Dates I Got Online
MySpace: June 25, 2007, late night
Facebook: June 26, 2007, early morning hours
MySpace Pirates of the Caribbean 3 Forum: December 2007
Minor Forums looking for auditions for Pirates of the Caribbean 4 & on Eurasians: February 2008
IMDb: February 2008 started posting once every month on the Johnny Depp board and regularly about Sweeney Todd: the Demon Barber of Fleet Street and Alice in Wonderland (2010) August|September 2008
YouTube: probably early 2008
IMDb Soapbox: Thanksgiving 2008 & more often by January 2009 - I got off when I changed my name. I think people were depressed and left. They were posting lots of successful topics on race that were interesting to weave and fight through, often on like indian law and comparing Asians with indians.
Blogger: June 2009
Twitter: by January 2010
Tumblr: August|September 2012 (got my account I think early 2010)
My Life
I got store cards, and my parents don't want to ever pay them back. Me thinking my life used to become an experiment and being distracted while trying to concentrate in college was also a problem. These 2 things I think caused me to feel guilty and very bothered to the point I couldn't stand it, unless I was in my room with the fan I had on. I didn't think to get ear plugs. I don't think I wanted to buy music.
My Mom
Lots of things have shaped my life. I think the biggest thing was when I started to look attractive when I was 11, but I don't know when my life became an experience and it probably doesn't matter. So, people were treating me like I didn't matter and like bad people were right to make me feel bad and ... I just wanted to be funny and the reason was good. I said, "Aw no," when my dad came home from work. It was because I didn't finish my homework and didn't get to spend time with him. So, we moved to the New Orleans area, and I ended up staying up every night. I also gained more weight. I did talk to my dad but about not having friends a lot at night. However, I had to stay up late every night finishing my homework but did the best. I did look more European but not as well-respected.
I'm not sure, but I think something else shaped my life. My mom's younger sister's kids wrote to my brother and I. I don't really know how old I was because I don't remember if the younger brother, who must be 8-10 years younger than me, wrote. They gave us nice stationary. I felt bad because we didn't have any and my mom didn't buy us stuff that much. I think I was saving money and unsure why I felt I would never get around to it. I just felt like my mom knocked me out in how she acted every time I tried to make myself remember to write.
I guess something else that offset me was that my parents couldn't take that I wasn't perfect when I was born, even though I had some strong strengths, though not like an ideal puffalump baby. Also, I wasn't white but had dark blue eyes. I think, they thought I was sarcastic.
Also, my brother was the opposite of me. He didn't seem as white in his desires outwardly and in his behavior, and he tried to act submissive so that I would have to. I already was unhappy I never really felt babied the way other kids my age did. Then, my cousin was born, and my life became havoc every vacation and for maybe 1 1|2 or 2 years every weekend. I have younger relatives up north, too, which is just as bad.
I did gymnastics once or twice a week until I turned 9 and art growing up since I was a toddler. When I was 9, the music teacher's daughter got glasses. I don't know why, but it just came out without thinking, literally no control, but out of empathy, "I'd rather go blind than wear glasses." I soon after got glasses. A friend took me to see a movie. Funny her mom didn't have her wear eye makeup when she got older.
When I was 7, I called a girl a jackass for lightly slapping another girl. I think the boys tested me to put up my middle finger. Actually, I jumped in.
Viking last name + Scottish, Jewish, French, Irish, English
Me Growing Up
I have some good pictures of me that might be developed from the hurricane|flood Katrina. There's one when I was 7 doing baton where I smile oh so brightly and tilt my head with a star and vest, purple, over black, with sequins. I have some good pictures when I was 3-4. I wore ponytails when I was 2, 3, & 4, all the time. Well, pigtails. I wore them sometimes until I was 7. I also have good pictures when I was 9, 10, and 11 and probably 8.
When I was little, I used to have this good tea. It's hard to describe, but it seemed like this purest tea, this general, traditional, fancy, complex tea. I guess it's kinda like coffee in how sorta it has that feel of something that rubs a lot.
For some reason, we stopped having it. I remember for some reason always getting antsy when we had it. It just happened. I think my mom grew up having tea.
I started having it again. The first thing I had, though, was a mocha, and I don't drink coffee. I'm the least coffee person in the world. However, I do like the smell a lot and when I do have coffee.
So, I was born a little brown baby with dark blue eyes that turned grayish blue when I got fat and white. I think I wanted to keep looking that detailed, but I think my mom made me very plastered. I think my dad made my brother plastered, in a different way... Like, he had that crew cut look, in a way, but also developed most of his life a bowl cut look. He is born November 26, 1990, 11:30 P.M., Monday. I was born May 20, 1986, about 2:05-2:10 P.M., I think, on a Tuesday. We were both born on the east coast. He was born inland more north near where I was conceived on the beach, and I was born in the major city of the area above Miami, which is very major. I don't believe it is known outside of the area, but people who travel to Miami in Florida must know about it. It's a very homey place... Like, yea. Like, the technology and stuff makes you feel cozy, very much, a sort of astounding feel to it. It's very nice. Like, it just feels so cozy to sit there and watch TV. Going outside is so rich to see all the palm trees. I miss it so much. I moved away from the area when I was 5. I used to think I lived in all these cities. I think at age 2, I lived where Johnny Depp mostly grew up. Maybe, I'll formulate another map, later. I don't really feel so well, right now.
So, I grew up. When I moved to Jacksonville, the major city in Northeastern Florida, people asked if I was Chinese, but I don't know why. I had like big Anime eyes. I looked very sculpted.
I forgot to add, I think as a baby, I was a bit like grotesque in my fascinations, though I wouldn't want to be that way. I think I was sassy to my mom, though I was kinda fat and clumpy, yet smoothed over. Like, I had roles of fat, kinda glossed over flat. I probably looked so realistic because I found my dad has Jewish blood, Polish Jewish and Swiss Jewish. He also might be part German|Leichtensteiner|Austrian|French plus other French and German from his dad. The part I mentioned first is from his mom. The Jewish is from his mom. I think his dad has Scottish blood, as well as she, though I grew up thinking not. That makes me wonder about how much other people have. I think I have it major, like in dominant last names from males. Not much substace, though.
Also, when I went up north, this is kinda grotesque in how it popularized as a peak of interest, my grandma acted brutally racist to me and then was indirect, as for others, in their doings to me thereafter, when I didn't accept it in my unconscious attitude. I noticed I do stuff without thinking now. I think with my mom, I had predicted the late 90s, like 1996 or 1995 or even 1994, as a baby, and was sassy about being fat. Like, I know in my picture I positioned my head in a weird way to the side and probably twitched, like I do now, a lot. I was just mad about being mixed race. I don't know why I had it so bad for having the right goals in mind as a mixed person.
I guess, when I was born, I didn't look as healthy as I could have. I looked a little disgusting after birth, as well, laid out. Not really dirty. I should put the pictures back up in a sub-album.
I think I had very wood, sorta illuminated, emotional colored hair, but it looked pleasantly black from afar. It got so dark. My brother had medium brown hair, but I never noticed, and then it got very black. He's not as naturally dark as me and was born fat and red. I posted his picture once, but I wasn't supposed to. I'm not sure why I did. I think I thought I wanted to show some people, but I talked to the world. He's on Facebook but not my friend. He posts pictures, like a whole bunch from trips.
You can guess from other evidence what my life was like. I have lots of good stories to tell I may tell later because it would take a long time.
The only video game I played was Frogger. I saw these really advanced ones when computers first came out or became popular, rather, the advanced ones that weren't like typewriters. It was about flying and landing a ship in space, kinda complex, didn't understand it, really. Also, there was one with such gooey blood, going through like a tomb like one of those things at MGM. I did get to all the levels and was pretty good at it, really. I'm not sure if I'd go back and do it. I think I have, like those handheld ones. It was very easy. I forgot, I also played Zoo Tycoon and SIM Safari. It was my brother's. I remember SIM City, too. I stayed up all night playing Zoo Tycoon several times, with my brother sleeping on the couch. I had so many Bengal Tigers, like 100, which isn't like something advanced to do. I might have had like 500. They even have Yetis, I think. This was back in 2003.
It's also funny, my brother got a Golden Retriever when I went to bed early to play for church. The priest of 30 years retired. We got a new one with a couple in music, but the man was the active one. The woman just sang. He played organ and directed. He was Italian and Cajun. They had a cute daughter with mousy medium brown kinda bright brown long hair who was about 5. She was so cute with her hair wrapped up for Girl Scouts. We used to stay up and watch Atlantis 2, Scooby Doo and the Alien Invaders, and The Rescuers.
I was Dorothy for Halloween when I was 10 and 11. I wore a different jean jumper over a white T-shirt. I had a basket. My friend with white hair got a real costume of it one Halloween, which was weird in the nation's oldest continuing city, weird to find.
When I lived in the nation's oldest continuing city, I went to a Woolsworth that closed. I wanted a striped small backpack, probably blue, probably navy blue. I had money for my birthday, maybe from my older aunt. My mom seemed to like me to get a purse. I got a leather, patched black one, downtown, old buildings. Woolsworth soon shut down, and I had spent my money. My favorite restaurants there closed down, Pizza Garden, which had thick Sicilian pizza, and it was of high quality, very neat, with a place to eat outside, in the outskirts of downtown, an old Spanish city. It's from 1565, I think. Also, there was the Heritage Walkway on Saint George Street, which I passed when I walked to school sometimes, with my mom and brother. You go down a line of shops and there's a bar. I got a little pizza that was really good an often got lemonade. I didn't like it when I was little but first shared it with my dad at a festival. I loved it so much. It was so substantial and complex. I was 7, I think. I remember seeing younger boys with cheap plastic cups of beer, and it horrified me. My dad worked the kiddie stuff in 2 places. In the 1st, we even had a Thanksgiving festival. I saw someone do a somersault in the air there, an older boy I think, and I couldn't believe it. My dad broke or rather did something to his knee when we moved again when he worked a basketball booth, in the New Orleans area, his first injury, the 2nd being the other knee when we moved to Orlando. He got surgery again, and I spent money on my store cards that they're not paying, ever. Something else interesting is in the Wax Museum, which I lost the video of with my computer and probably made private on YouTube, I'm pretty sure, for some reason, or deleted, they had a substantial block set for Michael Jackson I remember leaning over in a graveyard, which might have been 20 feet. There was this sinister music that featured crackling laughing at the end, and it made me like jump out of my skin that they'd be that retarded. My dad told me it was one of his songs. Speaking of which, when I lived there, there was a place for retired nuns, and it was so funny when someone thought it was "retarded" as we walked to something, not sure what, maybe church. We lived at the oldest parish in the nation, Catholic, which was burned down. We walked to church once a week. I was in choir then, too, and once a week on Sundays. Before, I was at church every week and an alter server, did gymnastics once a week and baton. I wasn't allowed to carry the cross under one older lady and was so enraged. I was 7, I think. I couldn't be an alter server if I was in choir next. There was no choir for kids in the New Orleans area. They made a Youth Choir, though, and I played keyboard in it. It was an old-looking church. It was kinda exciting. I did Youth Group, too. I liked touring, walking around the churches in New Orleans. I saw the Saint Louis Cathedral. When I went to arts school in New Orleans, my teacher had red hair, a guy, and he played guitar. He played there. He played the end song with the girl and Nutcracker, too, and it inspired me so much because I did ballet. It just overcame me. I went there one year on Saturdays and before with everyone else in the summer and got the highest award, along with another girl with strawberry hair dyed red, who stayed in a hotel, while I was in the nice dorms of my future college, which were the only ones I couldn't stay in because I didn't have a group. That girl got to play Titanic with others, piano, and I did the duet with her, the performance. I played that, the real version, when I was 11|12, in 1998, starting at age 9 1|2. I was very advanced. I practiced the same stuff before I started, and I never told my teacher. She did get mad at me later. I did an easy version of Moonlight Sonata. I wanted to play for the senior play my first year of high school, was recommended by someone knowing I was trying out for Talented Music for the first semester of my second year. My mom didn't know about trying out that much in advance. The teacher ended up playing. She took out the hard stuff, but this boy I liked was impressed I could do Moonlight Sonata, the beginning and probably an easy version but maybe not. When I didn't get an A in American History Gifted, the music teacher from before came back and counseled me but didn't convince me out of the class. I think my aunt gave me the music I played before for my first piano lessons.
I've had a rather weird life. I did lots of activities in school, this one or these 2 years, high school. I've always done something or some things. I've liked drawing since I was 3 and gymnastics since I was 1 3|4. I did tennis with my brother at 11 and my friend until I moved at 12 and did it until after I started college, same with martial arts but since age 12. I started these 2 things after my brother. I also did modeling at JCPenney with my tennis teacher's wife. He was probably in his early 70s. My piano teacher I finally got was probably in her 70s, Italian, and from the Bronx, I think, and got certificates at Juilliard. She used to play, and people in the neighborhood heard her. Her husband didn't want her to play, so she stopped. She was really like automatic, like I was crap. I was highly esteemed in piano, since I started at 9 1|2 and played at church until I moved and then played organ. I also majored in organ. It was my secondary instrument, and then I made it my major instrument after I was kicked out of piano and voice and my major in Music Education and went up north. I took special art classes at 9, walked after school, in the nation's oldest continuing city, which was Spanish, until my grandma gave us her car and I did piano. There was no ballet, and that's why I quit gymnastics. I wanted a harder ballet school and thought they were racist when we lived in not so south Southeastern Florida but near where I'm from originally... My mom never found another school. I said I wanted to get out, though, when she asked after I informed her of my intentions. I did ballet when we moved to the New Orleans area at 12, starting when I was 12 1|2. I looked at a modern school first and was upset it was once a week. They wanted me to wait, but I didn't. It fixed my scoliosis I just got. I noticed my back went back, and I seemed fatter, before we moved. I didn't seem as detailed when we moved. The reason I became feminine was from reading books of people in America from a long time ago, but that was just American Girls and before the Little House Books. I got up to the Long Winter but have looked through the books ahead. I used to read Zoo Books from front to cover when I was 8. Well, I'm gonna go, now, to take a shower and do something else, I think.
I've been cursing at my dad so I don't curse at other people and because I think he told other people what to do, but he may die!
I curse like this blatantly now because I know if I don't somehow something worse will happen later.
When I blog, I have to go back and delete an Enter before the text because I paste it in from Notepad.
Do you wanna know something really gay? So, my dad got me a Nook. I blog on the Apple browser because it's the only one working. I can't right click and get the spelling of a word, anymore.
Tim Burton & Ellen DeGeneres
After I was encouraged by a boy online and my mom, while I noticed in the background my dad wasn't assisting and Tim Burton was sorta not attentive, I thought Helena Bonham Carter was sending me like telepathic or symbolic messages to, for fun, call her daughter the n word. She said Tim said their son would be gay from listening to Judy Garland on the bonus features of Sweeney Todd.
After that, Tim Burton stopped showing up in videos online a lot. Also, I stopped getting the feeling he was talking to me on IMDb.
Something else that rings a fancy is that Ellen DeGeneres stopped being as attentive, as well, such as by before posting online more, though the reason I found it mattered was because I noticed it was when Tim Burton had done that before. I had a period away from keeping up with each of them, as well. On the topic, I don't really care, but I get the feeling that I'm getting a weird experience. Tim Burton rarely posts online, and Ellen only goes on Twitter. I guess that's something else annoying. I've seen them say a lot, and it's annoying then.
My Dad & Helena Bonham Carter
I keep getting annoying messages concerning them and, with my dad, inklings on what his grandma thinks on how he treats me.
Helena Bonham Carter has pointedly separated me from others racially, like it's just a way of getting to know me.
They and others think they can suggest a lot of things...
People in Orlando Where I Live
They keep being suggestive, like every one of them it seems at times and was at times, like they have to do something to hurt me each time they are nice to me just to be safe, like take something I do and bore it into my memory, so that it will come up in association with other things, often with my future kids! ':0
Medicine
It made me tired, and I finally just quit taking it, with my dad having been a devil to me. I think it's made me tired and laborious-feeling. I don't want to believe in life like there's no tomorrow or however you'd say it, but I came home from college and then quit ballet in order to grow and become a movie star, starting out as an model and a minor actor. I barely made it but could stretch taller and taller, making a difference and probably slimming me out. Now, however, I've shot up like a stalk of celery. I feel like crap. I'm made of Risperdal, for Schizophrenia. I had a friend who was always a lot shorter, and she took medicine and now has a huge chest and is larger than me. Her parents are 45 yeras older, born in 1941, the father older. My friends seem to "advertise" me, in their own way, and so do others through them. I just hope it isn't my parents's fault, but maybe they just wanted what's best for me, as who wouldn't? I'm not saying who, now, but it's something that bothers me because she's also younger and has somewhat fine white hair and big, light blue eyes. She's only 2 months younger. =| I always have to be careful of that, with anyone even a little younger, so much as a day. You also guessed it, there are kids with dads younger than me out there, and people from the 1953 era are really annoying. They are too fancy yet don't want to talk about anything important with certain people. I've never met any who are inherently inhibited, you might say. I was really annoyed to meet adults who were shorter and fatter than me, too, so I feel really weird about my size. After eating at Cracker Barrel, I decided to start eating more heartily. I felt tight eating healthy or heartily. I know I really need the nutrition to make me stronger. My mom used to buy me cheap hamburgers and had me make healthy pizza. After I went to the mental hospital, after the n word thing, my dad bought a bunch of Pizza Pockets, which taste horrible compared to the original ones. I don't know why that would make me bigger than the hamburgers. I know the medicine has mellowed me out, the original idea I had when I jotted this down, though that's not the purpose of the problem, so-to-speak. I just don't have any punch nor fight. It like hurts me to think about it. On a related note, I found that Tim Burton went behind my back and decided that though I was an amazing person with a strong frame, physically and mentally, he decided to go and trick me and reduce me after all these years, like it's important, to have a sorta wobbly frame. Also, I felt Helena Bonham Carter did it. I don't want to become shit just because of other people. '}:|
Catching People Naked
Can you believe the liberty people are taking since the n word thing?
Johnny Depp & Tim Burton
I'm not gonna be testy like the people he worked with on "21 Jump Street."
Tim Burton thinks he's onto me, and people think he "can't do it, too."
On Guard
I'm constantly on guard for feeling in certain areas and in certain ways, physical like bubbles of energy. I've felt the presence of a lot of pressure though myself do not feel the actual pressure itself. It's often difficult to contain and control and takes a lot of effort and work. Sometimes, I forget about it.
Chemical Reaction
I notice people are always throwing me in and making me think of all sorts of things to make problems more complicated and more boring.
Old Antsy Farts
I'm tired of this bullshit. (I meant to say old, antsy people, but I don't know why I said, "farts." I know it's a word...)
Never Reaching a Point
When I reach a point, people are randomly reacting meanly to me.
My Babies! =0
I liked a boy my freshman year of high school, and he never kept in contact with me. I met a boy online, but now he's not gonna get with me.
2012-10-27 I'm being haunted by the ad I saw of a tall, thin black lady, a fairly large, almost square ad, near the top right corner of my computer, folding up a little laptop. I think it was on Friday when Ellen DeGeneres was flying to Washington, D.C., to receive an award.
2012-10-27 I'm worried my rights to the internet will be taken away.
2012-10-27 I keep hearing clicks and strange reverberating sounds, affecting me with bits of weird sensations. They make me think of something insulting that upsets me and sorta makes me go in inner convulsions.
Name: Christina Ann Barrett
Female
Race: Chinese Indonesian, Viking, Anglo|Irish|German, Jewish
Date of Birth: May 20, 1986 - 1-2 Weeks Early
Where I Live: Orlando
Hair: Black & Curly Wavy
Eyes: Dark Brown
Skin: Gold, White, & Pink
Favorite Pasttime: Baton Marching in Christmas Parade
~ * ~
Family
Chinese Indonesian (probably Mountainous Northwestern Chinese 600 years ago. lived as 2nd class 400 years ago)
Barrett - probably Norman Viking - Welsh - Irish (hired as mercenaries from Wales to help after war)
Donahue - Irish (real Irish)
Noon - Anglo-Irish (probably)
Barber - Norman Viking (probably English-Irish) - migrated from Ireland
Burkhart - Swabian - German|French|Swiss|Austrian|Liechtensteiner (probably)
Kifer - probably Polish-Jewish
Work - Northern Scottish Islands (according to history of last name inserted in family books)
Long - Anglo-Saxon Irish (probably)
Shultz - probably Swiss-Jewish or Polish-Jewish
Mortimer - Norman Viking (probably English-Irish)
Rickard - English (probably) but German-based (I think from the Work side)
*Anglo-Saxons - Northern German, Northern Dutch, and Southern Scandinavian (Norwegian|Swedish|Danish?)
*Norman Vikings - Norwegian and Danish
Family History
My Dad's Dad: Irish, French, German
My Dad's Mom's Mom: Dutch
My Dad's Mom: French
Home
My Mom's Family: a small city near the Capitol
My Dad's Dad's Family: from Northwestern Pennsylvania
My Dad's Mom's Family: from Northwestern Pennsylvania and Southwestern New York state
My Dad: from Northwestern Pennsylvania and Southwestern New York state
My Dad's Mom: from Northwestern Pennsylvania
Lifestyle
My Dad's Mom's Family: farmers
Accomplishments
My Dad's Mom's Family: invented a Jello recipe for a lot of money, Vaseline, and something else -eline
~ * ~
I got store cards, and my parents don't want to ever pay them back. Me thinking my life used to become an experiment and being distracted while trying to concentrate in college was also a problem. These 2 things I think caused me to feel guilty and very bothered to the point I couldn't stand it, unless I was in my room with the fan I had on. I didn't think to get ear plugs. I don't think I wanted to buy music.
I met a boy my 1st year of high school from New Orleans. However, I didn't get into Talented Theater, yet. He left. I have a feeling I was supposed to look for him, but he won't talk to me, now.
I met a boy online, and he was gonna marry me. I didn't respond just then. He continued to say how we'd have kids. He got mad when I made a topic just to talk about him. I got mad when he posted a jumping panda. I'd gotten really mad, and he's gotten fed up with me yet not out of control. For some reason online, people surround him like vultures. It's because they know how he is online when he posts on a message board.
I thought someone wanted me to call their daughter, who was almost 2 that month, the n word. I thought the people involved in the experiment were not being direct in how they communicated with me and that I was supposed to. She said her husband said their son would be gay on the bonus features of a movie. I thought, since they were weird, that they wanted me to do it in a friendly way when I was feeling hysterically upset and enraptured yet mad to make it seem more friendly.
My aunt came over for my birthday, and for some reason it didn't seem as special for my mom. I posted how I felt online. My grandma had me call her every night and read a Bible reading. It would make me feel I have to put in effort to make my egg sacks feel okay all night. Finally, I didn't feel as much there. I stopped talking to her a little before my birthday.
I thought of a bad thing|word because my mom, my psychiatrist, and maybe that boy and other people on the message board made these words come up. I was feeling some slight yet requiring a sort of invisible|feelingless strong effort to not go in convulsions in a certain area. That's why the word snapped out of me, as I was lying in bed. I stopped responding to my dad thinking "it's not it" for a day
if I do something stupid like that. Wait, before that, I got mad I thought someone was thinking my mom was a nigger and I thought of that bad word, then, too, just because I didn't feel like thinking about it. That changed my life for awhile. Wait, what really happened was I came out and just was feeling slightly snappy as my dad was talking to my grandma. Things changed then for a long time. I also happened to be stomping on the streets at some people. I do that sometimes but try not to. It's been since Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, like hearing the painful truck doors fall every time on my way to class. I'd throw my backpack and stuff across the floor. Since the first thing I mentioned, my dad and people have been following suit and always insulting me and justifying their thoughts and anything that's "too good to be true."
The problem is I'm constantly feeling pressure in my egg sacks, not a lot of feeling, but a lot of "invisible"feeling-less" effort to keep it from spinning. I think I was set up. I also get upset when I feel that in other parts of my body.
Old Website
Facts About Me
Roman Catholic Confirmation Name: Joanna (named in accordance with a tiny section of the Catechism of the Roman Catholic Church of thinking up names)
Things in My Room: noisemaker (soon a loud fan) & foam I have to get online now, jugs of water, sofa, nice fuzzy hot pink pillow chair back and arm support, extension chord outside of my room for a better socket for computer because it turned off a lot during rain, electric guitar and was learning notes from my dad's old book, keyboard, small harp
Personal Care: Sheer Blonde lightest shades, waterproof earplugs I have to get online now, used to use bathroom wipes all the time, adult diapers in a large pack from Costco, vitamins (including heart pills and flaxseed oil)
Dates I Got Online
MySpace: June 25, 2007, late night
Facebook: June 26, 2007, early morning hours
MySpace Pirates of the Caribbean 3 Forum: December 2007
Minor Forums looking for auditions for Pirates of the Caribbean 4 & on Eurasians: February 2008
IMDb: February 2008 started posting once every month on the Johnny Depp board and regularly about Sweeney Todd: the Demon Barber of Fleet Street and Alice in Wonderland (2010) August|September 2008
YouTube: probably early 2008
IMDb Soapbox: Thanksgiving 2008 & more often by January 2009 - I got off when I changed my name. I think people were depressed and left. They were posting lots of successful topics on race that were interesting to weave and fight through, often on like indian law and comparing Asians with indians.
Blogger: June 2009
Twitter: by January 2010
Tumblr: August|September 2012 (got my account I think early 2010)
My Life
I got store cards, and my parents don't want to ever pay them back. Me thinking my life used to become an experiment and being distracted while trying to concentrate in college was also a problem. These 2 things I think caused me to feel guilty and very bothered to the point I couldn't stand it, unless I was in my room with the fan I had on. I didn't think to get ear plugs. I don't think I wanted to buy music.
I met a boy my 1st year of high school from New Orleans. However, I didn't get into Talented Theater, yet. He left. I have a feeling I was supposed to look for him, but he won't talk to me, now.
I met a boy online, and he was gonna marry me. I didn't respond just then. He continued to say how we'd have kids. He got mad when I made a topic just to talk about him. I got mad when he posted a jumping panda. I'd gotten really mad, and he's gotten fed up with me yet not out of control. For some reason online, people surround him like vultures. It's because they know how he is online when he posts on a message board.
I thought someone wanted me to call their daughter, who was almost 2 that month, the n word. I thought the people involved in the experiment were not being direct in how they communicated with me and that I was supposed to. She said her husband said their son would be gay on the bonus features of a movie. I thought, since they were weird, that they wanted me to do it in a friendly way when I was feeling hysterically upset and enraptured yet mad to make it seem more friendly.
My aunt came over for my birthday, and for some reason it didn't seem as special for my mom. I posted how I felt online. My grandma had me call her every night and read a Bible reading. It would make me feel I have to put in effort to make my egg sacks feel okay all night. Finally, I didn't feel as much there. I stopped talking to her a little before my birthday.
I thought of a bad thing|word because my mom, my psychiatrist, and maybe that boy and other people on the message board made these words come up. I was feeling some slight yet requiring a sort of invisible|feelingless strong effort to not go in convulsions in a certain area. That's why the word snapped out of me, as I was lying in bed. I stopped responding to my dad thinking "it's not it" for a day if I do something stupid like that. Wait, before that, I got mad I thought someone was thinking my mom was a nigger and I thought of that bad word, then, too, just because I didn't feel like thinking about it. That changed my life for awhile. Wait, what really happened was I came out and just was feeling slightly snappy as my dad was talking to my grandma. Things changed then for a long time. I also happened to be stomping on the streets at some people. I do that sometimes but try not to. It's been since Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, like hearing the painful truck doors fall every time on my way to class. I'd throw my backpack and stuff across the floor. Since the first thing I mentioned, my dad and people have been following suit and always insulting me and justifying their thoughts and anything that's "too good to be true."
The problem is I'm constantly feeling pressure in my egg sacks, not a lot of feeling, but a lot of "invisible|feeling-less" effort to keep it from spinning. I think I was set up. I also get upset when I feel that in other parts of my body.
When I'm in my room and in the house, I hear random clicks and other gurgling noises. For some reason, they affect me. I'm sensitive to noise. I don't know why.
I took Risperdal. My psychiatrist lackadaisically took me off the Depression pills I was given at the mental hospital when I told him it wasn't related to schizophrenia, basically. However, I lost my female thing for a year. My dad didn't have me cut up the side effects pill, and I think it made me sick and justified me to quit taken the medicine, altogether. I've gotten bigger and lumpier since the mental hospital. I had heavier ones and then very light ones. I used to have to wear diapers when I decided to come home from college, though it was because I was kicked out of my major and couldn't stand the environment. I was thinking of not going to college because Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was coming out. In fact, I heaved upon seeing the poster my dad presented to me on the way to some big movie...
Lots of things have shaped my life. I think the biggest thing was when I started to look attractive when I was 11, but I don't know when my life became an experience and it probably doesn't matter. So, people were treating me like I didn't matter and like bad people were right to make me feel bad and ... I just wanted to be funny and the reason was good. I said, "Aw no," when my dad came home from work. It was because I didn't finish my homework and didn't get to spend time with him. So, we moved to the New Orleans area, and I ended up staying up every night. I also gained more weight. I did talk to my dad but about not having friends a lot at night. However, I had to stay up late every night finishing my homework but did the best. I did look more European but not as well-respected.
I'm not sure, but I think something else shaped my life. My mom's younger sister's kids wrote to my brother and I. I don't really know how old I was because I don't remember if the younger brother, who must be 8-10 years younger than me, wrote. They gave us nice stationary. I felt bad because we didn't have any and my mom didn't buy us stuff that much. I think I was saving money and unsure why I felt I would never get around to it. I just felt like my mom knocked me out in how she acted every time I tried to make myself remember to write.
I did gymnastics once or twice a week until I turned 9 and art growing up since I was a toddler. When I was 9, the music teacher's daughter got glasses. I don't know why, but it just came out without thinking, literally no control, but out of empathy, "I'd rather go blind than wear glasses." I soon after got glasses. A friend took me to see a movie. Funny her mom didn't have her wear eye makeup when she got older.
When I was 7, I called a girl a jackass for lightly slapping another girl. I think the boys tested me to put up my middle finger. Actually, I jumped in.
My dad now seems to claim it's his mom who's been pressuring him.
My Mom
Lots of things have shaped my life. I think the biggest thing was when I started to look attractive when I was 11, but I don't know when my life became an experience and it probably doesn't matter. So, people were treating me like I didn't matter and like bad people were right to make me feel bad and ... I just wanted to be funny and the reason was good. I said, "Aw no," when my dad came home from work. It was because I didn't finish my homework and didn't get to spend time with him. So, we moved to the New Orleans area, and I ended up staying up every night. I also gained more weight. I did talk to my dad but about not having friends a lot at night. However, I had to stay up late every night finishing my homework but did the best. I did look more European but not as well-respected.
I'm not sure, but I think something else shaped my life. My mom's younger sister's kids wrote to my brother and I. I don't really know how old I was because I don't remember if the younger brother, who must be 8-10 years younger than me, wrote. They gave us nice stationary. I felt bad because we didn't have any and my mom didn't buy us stuff that much. I think I was saving money and unsure why I felt I would never get around to it. I just felt like my mom knocked me out in how she acted every time I tried to make myself remember to write.
I guess something else that offset me was that my parents couldn't take that I wasn't perfect when I was born, even though I had some strong strengths, though not like an ideal puffalump baby. Also, I wasn't white but had dark blue eyes. I think, they thought I was sarcastic.
Also, my brother was the opposite of me. He didn't seem as white in his desires outwardly and in his behavior, and he tried to act submissive so that I would have to. I already was unhappy I never really felt babied the way other kids my age did. Then, my cousin was born, and my life became havoc every vacation and for maybe 1 1|2 or 2 years every weekend. I have younger relatives up north, too, which is just as bad.
I did gymnastics once or twice a week until I turned 9 and art growing up since I was a toddler. When I was 9, the music teacher's daughter got glasses. I don't know why, but it just came out without thinking, literally no control, but out of empathy, "I'd rather go blind than wear glasses." I soon after got glasses. A friend took me to see a movie. Funny her mom didn't have her wear eye makeup when she got older.
When I was 7, I called a girl a jackass for lightly slapping another girl. I think the boys tested me to put up my middle finger. Actually, I jumped in.
Viking last name + Scottish, Jewish, French, Irish, English
Me Growing Up
I have some good pictures of me that might be developed from the hurricane|flood Katrina. There's one when I was 7 doing baton where I smile oh so brightly and tilt my head with a star and vest, purple, over black, with sequins. I have some good pictures when I was 3-4. I wore ponytails when I was 2, 3, & 4, all the time. Well, pigtails. I wore them sometimes until I was 7. I also have good pictures when I was 9, 10, and 11 and probably 8.
When I was little, I used to have this good tea. It's hard to describe, but it seemed like this purest tea, this general, traditional, fancy, complex tea. I guess it's kinda like coffee in how sorta it has that feel of something that rubs a lot.
For some reason, we stopped having it. I remember for some reason always getting antsy when we had it. It just happened. I think my mom grew up having tea.
I started having it again. The first thing I had, though, was a mocha, and I don't drink coffee. I'm the least coffee person in the world. However, I do like the smell a lot and when I do have coffee.
So, I was born a little brown baby with dark blue eyes that turned grayish blue when I got fat and white. I think I wanted to keep looking that detailed, but I think my mom made me very plastered. I think my dad made my brother plastered, in a different way... Like, he had that crew cut look, in a way, but also developed most of his life a bowl cut look. He is born November 26, 1990, 11:30 P.M., Monday. I was born May 20, 1986, about 2:05-2:10 P.M., I think, on a Tuesday. We were both born on the east coast. He was born inland more north near where I was conceived on the beach, and I was born in the major city of the area above Miami, which is very major. I don't believe it is known outside of the area, but people who travel to Miami in Florida must know about it. It's a very homey place... Like, yea. Like, the technology and stuff makes you feel cozy, very much, a sort of astounding feel to it. It's very nice. Like, it just feels so cozy to sit there and watch TV. Going outside is so rich to see all the palm trees. I miss it so much. I moved away from the area when I was 5. I used to think I lived in all these cities. I think at age 2, I lived where Johnny Depp mostly grew up. Maybe, I'll formulate another map, later. I don't really feel so well, right now.
So, I grew up. When I moved to Jacksonville, the major city in Northeastern Florida, people asked if I was Chinese, but I don't know why. I had like big Anime eyes. I looked very sculpted.
I forgot to add, I think as a baby, I was a bit like grotesque in my fascinations, though I wouldn't want to be that way. I think I was sassy to my mom, though I was kinda fat and clumpy, yet smoothed over. Like, I had roles of fat, kinda glossed over flat. I probably looked so realistic because I found my dad has Jewish blood, Polish Jewish and Swiss Jewish. He also might be part German|Leichtensteiner|Austrian|French plus other French and German from his dad. The part I mentioned first is from his mom. The Jewish is from his mom. I think his dad has Scottish blood, as well as she, though I grew up thinking not. That makes me wonder about how much other people have. I think I have it major, like in dominant last names from males. Not much substace, though.
Also, when I went up north, this is kinda grotesque in how it popularized as a peak of interest, my grandma acted brutally racist to me and then was indirect, as for others, in their doings to me thereafter, when I didn't accept it in my unconscious attitude. I noticed I do stuff without thinking now. I think with my mom, I had predicted the late 90s, like 1996 or 1995 or even 1994, as a baby, and was sassy about being fat. Like, I know in my picture I positioned my head in a weird way to the side and probably twitched, like I do now, a lot. I was just mad about being mixed race. I don't know why I had it so bad for having the right goals in mind as a mixed person.
I guess, when I was born, I didn't look as healthy as I could have. I looked a little disgusting after birth, as well, laid out. Not really dirty. I should put the pictures back up in a sub-album.
I think I had very wood, sorta illuminated, emotional colored hair, but it looked pleasantly black from afar. It got so dark. My brother had medium brown hair, but I never noticed, and then it got very black. He's not as naturally dark as me and was born fat and red. I posted his picture once, but I wasn't supposed to. I'm not sure why I did. I think I thought I wanted to show some people, but I talked to the world. He's on Facebook but not my friend. He posts pictures, like a whole bunch from trips.
You can guess from other evidence what my life was like. I have lots of good stories to tell I may tell later because it would take a long time.
The only video game I played was Frogger. I saw these really advanced ones when computers first came out or became popular, rather, the advanced ones that weren't like typewriters. It was about flying and landing a ship in space, kinda complex, didn't understand it, really. Also, there was one with such gooey blood, going through like a tomb like one of those things at MGM. I did get to all the levels and was pretty good at it, really. I'm not sure if I'd go back and do it. I think I have, like those handheld ones. It was very easy. I forgot, I also played Zoo Tycoon and SIM Safari. It was my brother's. I remember SIM City, too. I stayed up all night playing Zoo Tycoon several times, with my brother sleeping on the couch. I had so many Bengal Tigers, like 100, which isn't like something advanced to do. I might have had like 500. They even have Yetis, I think. This was back in 2003.
It's also funny, my brother got a Golden Retriever when I went to bed early to play for church. The priest of 30 years retired. We got a new one with a couple in music, but the man was the active one. The woman just sang. He played organ and directed. He was Italian and Cajun. They had a cute daughter with mousy medium brown kinda bright brown long hair who was about 5. She was so cute with her hair wrapped up for Girl Scouts. We used to stay up and watch Atlantis 2, Scooby Doo and the Alien Invaders, and The Rescuers.
I was Dorothy for Halloween when I was 10 and 11. I wore a different jean jumper over a white T-shirt. I had a basket. My friend with white hair got a real costume of it one Halloween, which was weird in the nation's oldest continuing city, weird to find.
When I lived in the nation's oldest continuing city, I went to a Woolsworth that closed. I wanted a striped small backpack, probably blue, probably navy blue. I had money for my birthday, maybe from my older aunt. My mom seemed to like me to get a purse. I got a leather, patched black one, downtown, old buildings. Woolsworth soon shut down, and I had spent my money. My favorite restaurants there closed down, Pizza Garden, which had thick Sicilian pizza, and it was of high quality, very neat, with a place to eat outside, in the outskirts of downtown, an old Spanish city. It's from 1565, I think. Also, there was the Heritage Walkway on Saint George Street, which I passed when I walked to school sometimes, with my mom and brother. You go down a line of shops and there's a bar. I got a little pizza that was really good an often got lemonade. I didn't like it when I was little but first shared it with my dad at a festival. I loved it so much. It was so substantial and complex. I was 7, I think. I remember seeing younger boys with cheap plastic cups of beer, and it horrified me. My dad worked the kiddie stuff in 2 places. In the 1st, we even had a Thanksgiving festival. I saw someone do a somersault in the air there, an older boy I think, and I couldn't believe it. My dad broke or rather did something to his knee when we moved again when he worked a basketball booth, in the New Orleans area, his first injury, the 2nd being the other knee when we moved to Orlando. He got surgery again, and I spent money on my store cards that they're not paying, ever. Something else interesting is in the Wax Museum, which I lost the video of with my computer and probably made private on YouTube, I'm pretty sure, for some reason, or deleted, they had a substantial block set for Michael Jackson I remember leaning over in a graveyard, which might have been 20 feet. There was this sinister music that featured crackling laughing at the end, and it made me like jump out of my skin that they'd be that retarded. My dad told me it was one of his songs. Speaking of which, when I lived there, there was a place for retired nuns, and it was so funny when someone thought it was "retarded" as we walked to something, not sure what, maybe church. We lived at the oldest parish in the nation, Catholic, which was burned down. We walked to church once a week. I was in choir then, too, and once a week on Sundays. Before, I was at church every week and an alter server, did gymnastics once a week and baton. I wasn't allowed to carry the cross under one older lady and was so enraged. I was 7, I think. I couldn't be an alter server if I was in choir next. There was no choir for kids in the New Orleans area. They made a Youth Choir, though, and I played keyboard in it. It was an old-looking church. It was kinda exciting. I did Youth Group, too. I liked touring, walking around the churches in New Orleans. I saw the Saint Louis Cathedral. When I went to arts school in New Orleans, my teacher had red hair, a guy, and he played guitar. He played there. He played the end song with the girl and Nutcracker, too, and it inspired me so much because I did ballet. It just overcame me. I went there one year on Saturdays and before with everyone else in the summer and got the highest award, along with another girl with strawberry hair dyed red, who stayed in a hotel, while I was in the nice dorms of my future college, which were the only ones I couldn't stay in because I didn't have a group. That girl got to play Titanic with others, piano, and I did the duet with her, the performance. I played that, the real version, when I was 11|12, in 1998, starting at age 9 1|2. I was very advanced. I practiced the same stuff before I started, and I never told my teacher. She did get mad at me later. I did an easy version of Moonlight Sonata. I wanted to play for the senior play my first year of high school, was recommended by someone knowing I was trying out for Talented Music for the first semester of my second year. My mom didn't know about trying out that much in advance. The teacher ended up playing. She took out the hard stuff, but this boy I liked was impressed I could do Moonlight Sonata, the beginning and probably an easy version but maybe not. When I didn't get an A in American History Gifted, the music teacher from before came back and counseled me but didn't convince me out of the class. I think my aunt gave me the music I played before for my first piano lessons.
I've had a rather weird life. I did lots of activities in school, this one or these 2 years, high school. I've always done something or some things. I've liked drawing since I was 3 and gymnastics since I was 1 3|4. I did tennis with my brother at 11 and my friend until I moved at 12 and did it until after I started college, same with martial arts but since age 12. I started these 2 things after my brother. I also did modeling at JCPenney with my tennis teacher's wife. He was probably in his early 70s. My piano teacher I finally got was probably in her 70s, Italian, and from the Bronx, I think, and got certificates at Juilliard. She used to play, and people in the neighborhood heard her. Her husband didn't want her to play, so she stopped. She was really like automatic, like I was crap. I was highly esteemed in piano, since I started at 9 1|2 and played at church until I moved and then played organ. I also majored in organ. It was my secondary instrument, and then I made it my major instrument after I was kicked out of piano and voice and my major in Music Education and went up north. I took special art classes at 9, walked after school, in the nation's oldest continuing city, which was Spanish, until my grandma gave us her car and I did piano. There was no ballet, and that's why I quit gymnastics. I wanted a harder ballet school and thought they were racist when we lived in not so south Southeastern Florida but near where I'm from originally... My mom never found another school. I said I wanted to get out, though, when she asked after I informed her of my intentions. I did ballet when we moved to the New Orleans area at 12, starting when I was 12 1|2. I looked at a modern school first and was upset it was once a week. They wanted me to wait, but I didn't. It fixed my scoliosis I just got. I noticed my back went back, and I seemed fatter, before we moved. I didn't seem as detailed when we moved. The reason I became feminine was from reading books of people in America from a long time ago, but that was just American Girls and before the Little House Books. I got up to the Long Winter but have looked through the books ahead. I used to read Zoo Books from front to cover when I was 8. Well, I'm gonna go, now, to take a shower and do something else, I think.
I've been cursing at my dad so I don't curse at other people and because I think he told other people what to do, but he may die!
I curse like this blatantly now because I know if I don't somehow something worse will happen later.
When I blog, I have to go back and delete an Enter before the text because I paste it in from Notepad.
Do you wanna know something really gay? So, my dad got me a Nook. I blog on the Apple browser because it's the only one working. I can't right click and get the spelling of a word, anymore.
Tim Burton & Ellen DeGeneres
After I was encouraged by a boy online and my mom, while I noticed in the background my dad wasn't assisting and Tim Burton was sorta not attentive, I thought Helena Bonham Carter was sending me like telepathic or symbolic messages to, for fun, call her daughter the n word. She said Tim said their son would be gay from listening to Judy Garland on the bonus features of Sweeney Todd.
After that, Tim Burton stopped showing up in videos online a lot. Also, I stopped getting the feeling he was talking to me on IMDb.
Something else that rings a fancy is that Ellen DeGeneres stopped being as attentive, as well, such as by before posting online more, though the reason I found it mattered was because I noticed it was when Tim Burton had done that before. I had a period away from keeping up with each of them, as well. On the topic, I don't really care, but I get the feeling that I'm getting a weird experience. Tim Burton rarely posts online, and Ellen only goes on Twitter. I guess that's something else annoying. I've seen them say a lot, and it's annoying then.
My Dad & Helena Bonham Carter
I keep getting annoying messages concerning them and, with my dad, inklings on what his grandma thinks on how he treats me.
Helena Bonham Carter has pointedly separated me from others racially, like it's just a way of getting to know me.
They and others think they can suggest a lot of things...
People in Orlando Where I Live
They keep being suggestive, like every one of them it seems at times and was at times, like they have to do something to hurt me each time they are nice to me just to be safe, like take something I do and bore it into my memory, so that it will come up in association with other things, often with my future kids! ':0
Medicine
It made me tired, and I finally just quit taking it, with my dad having been a devil to me. I think it's made me tired and laborious-feeling. I don't want to believe in life like there's no tomorrow or however you'd say it, but I came home from college and then quit ballet in order to grow and become a movie star, starting out as an model and a minor actor. I barely made it but could stretch taller and taller, making a difference and probably slimming me out. Now, however, I've shot up like a stalk of celery. I feel like crap. I'm made of Risperdal, for Schizophrenia. I had a friend who was always a lot shorter, and she took medicine and now has a huge chest and is larger than me. Her parents are 45 yeras older, born in 1941, the father older. My friends seem to "advertise" me, in their own way, and so do others through them. I just hope it isn't my parents's fault, but maybe they just wanted what's best for me, as who wouldn't? I'm not saying who, now, but it's something that bothers me because she's also younger and has somewhat fine white hair and big, light blue eyes. She's only 2 months younger. =| I always have to be careful of that, with anyone even a little younger, so much as a day. You also guessed it, there are kids with dads younger than me out there, and people from the 1953 era are really annoying. They are too fancy yet don't want to talk about anything important with certain people. I've never met any who are inherently inhibited, you might say. I was really annoyed to meet adults who were shorter and fatter than me, too, so I feel really weird about my size. After eating at Cracker Barrel, I decided to start eating more heartily. I felt tight eating healthy or heartily. I know I really need the nutrition to make me stronger. My mom used to buy me cheap hamburgers and had me make healthy pizza. After I went to the mental hospital, after the n word thing, my dad bought a bunch of Pizza Pockets, which taste horrible compared to the original ones. I don't know why that would make me bigger than the hamburgers. I know the medicine has mellowed me out, the original idea I had when I jotted this down, though that's not the purpose of the problem, so-to-speak. I just don't have any punch nor fight. It like hurts me to think about it. On a related note, I found that Tim Burton went behind my back and decided that though I was an amazing person with a strong frame, physically and mentally, he decided to go and trick me and reduce me after all these years, like it's important, to have a sorta wobbly frame. Also, I felt Helena Bonham Carter did it. I don't want to become shit just because of other people. '}:|
Catching People Naked
Can you believe the liberty people are taking since the n word thing?
Johnny Depp & Tim Burton
I'm not gonna be testy like the people he worked with on "21 Jump Street."
Tim Burton thinks he's onto me, and people think he "can't do it, too."
On Guard
I'm constantly on guard for feeling in certain areas and in certain ways, physical like bubbles of energy. I've felt the presence of a lot of pressure though myself do not feel the actual pressure itself. It's often difficult to contain and control and takes a lot of effort and work. Sometimes, I forget about it.
Chemical Reaction
I notice people are always throwing me in and making me think of all sorts of things to make problems more complicated and more boring.
Old Antsy Farts
I'm tired of this bullshit. (I meant to say old, antsy people, but I don't know why I said, "farts." I know it's a word...)
Never Reaching a Point
When I reach a point, people are randomly reacting meanly to me.
My Babies! =0
I liked a boy my freshman year of high school, and he never kept in contact with me. I met a boy online, but now he's not gonna get with me.
2012-10-27 I'm being haunted by the ad I saw of a tall, thin black lady, a fairly large, almost square ad, near the top right corner of my computer, folding up a little laptop. I think it was on Friday when Ellen DeGeneres was flying to Washington, D.C., to receive an award.
2012-10-27 I'm worried my rights to the internet will be taken away.
2012-10-27 I keep hearing clicks and strange reverberating sounds, affecting me with bits of weird sensations. They make me think of something insulting that upsets me and sorta makes me go in inner convulsions.
Name: Christina Ann Barrett
Female
Race: Chinese Indonesian, Viking, Anglo|Irish|German, Jewish
Date of Birth: May 20, 1986 - 1-2 Weeks Early
Where I Live: Orlando
Hair: Black & Curly Wavy
Eyes: Dark Brown
Skin: Gold, White, & Pink
Favorite Pasttime: Baton Marching in Christmas Parade
~ * ~
Family
Chinese Indonesian (probably Mountainous Northwestern Chinese 600 years ago. lived as 2nd class 400 years ago)
Barrett - probably Norman Viking - Welsh - Irish (hired as mercenaries from Wales to help after war)
Donahue - Irish (real Irish)
Noon - Anglo-Irish (probably)
Barber - Norman Viking (probably English-Irish) - migrated from Ireland
Burkhart - Swabian - German|French|Swiss|Austrian|Liechtensteiner (probably)
Kifer - probably Polish-Jewish
Work - Northern Scottish Islands (according to history of last name inserted in family books)
Long - Anglo-Saxon Irish (probably)
Shultz - probably Swiss-Jewish or Polish-Jewish
Mortimer - Norman Viking (probably English-Irish)
Rickard - English (probably) but German-based (I think from the Work side)
*Anglo-Saxons - Northern German, Northern Dutch, and Southern Scandinavian (Norwegian|Swedish|Danish?)
*Norman Vikings - Norwegian and Danish
Family History
My Dad's Dad: Irish, French, German
My Dad's Mom's Mom: Dutch
My Dad's Mom: French
Home
My Mom's Family: a small city near the Capitol
My Dad's Dad's Family: from Northwestern Pennsylvania
My Dad's Mom's Family: from Northwestern Pennsylvania and Southwestern New York state
My Dad: from Northwestern Pennsylvania and Southwestern New York state
My Dad's Mom: from Northwestern Pennsylvania
Lifestyle
My Dad's Mom's Family: farmers
Accomplishments
My Dad's Mom's Family: invented a Jello recipe for a lot of money, Vaseline, and something else -eline
~ * ~
I got store cards, and my parents don't want to ever pay them back. Me thinking my life used to become an experiment and being distracted while trying to concentrate in college was also a problem. These 2 things I think caused me to feel guilty and very bothered to the point I couldn't stand it, unless I was in my room with the fan I had on. I didn't think to get ear plugs. I don't think I wanted to buy music.
I met a boy my 1st year of high school from New Orleans. However, I didn't get into Talented Theater, yet. He left. I have a feeling I was supposed to look for him, but he won't talk to me, now.
I met a boy online, and he was gonna marry me. I didn't respond just then. He continued to say how we'd have kids. He got mad when I made a topic just to talk about him. I got mad when he posted a jumping panda. I'd gotten really mad, and he's gotten fed up with me yet not out of control. For some reason online, people surround him like vultures. It's because they know how he is online when he posts on a message board.
I thought someone wanted me to call their daughter, who was almost 2 that month, the n word. I thought the people involved in the experiment were not being direct in how they communicated with me and that I was supposed to. She said her husband said their son would be gay on the bonus features of a movie. I thought, since they were weird, that they wanted me to do it in a friendly way when I was feeling hysterically upset and enraptured yet mad to make it seem more friendly.
My aunt came over for my birthday, and for some reason it didn't seem as special for my mom. I posted how I felt online. My grandma had me call her every night and read a Bible reading. It would make me feel I have to put in effort to make my egg sacks feel okay all night. Finally, I didn't feel as much there. I stopped talking to her a little before my birthday.
I thought of a bad thing|word because my mom, my psychiatrist, and maybe that boy and other people on the message board made these words come up. I was feeling some slight yet requiring a sort of invisible|feelingless strong effort to not go in convulsions in a certain area. That's why the word snapped out of me, as I was lying in bed. I stopped responding to my dad thinking "it's not it" for a day
if I do something stupid like that. Wait, before that, I got mad I thought someone was thinking my mom was a nigger and I thought of that bad word, then, too, just because I didn't feel like thinking about it. That changed my life for awhile. Wait, what really happened was I came out and just was feeling slightly snappy as my dad was talking to my grandma. Things changed then for a long time. I also happened to be stomping on the streets at some people. I do that sometimes but try not to. It's been since Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, like hearing the painful truck doors fall every time on my way to class. I'd throw my backpack and stuff across the floor. Since the first thing I mentioned, my dad and people have been following suit and always insulting me and justifying their thoughts and anything that's "too good to be true."
The problem is I'm constantly feeling pressure in my egg sacks, not a lot of feeling, but a lot of "invisible"feeling-less" effort to keep it from spinning. I think I was set up. I also get upset when I feel that in other parts of my body.
Old Website
